ibunka TB_U10

Japan, yet another cultural pattern Hungarian respondent Patricia notes on page 65 that “ In Japan, my experience is that usually it is enough to describe your problem, and the other person will understand that you are asking for help.” But this can actually lead to a different outcome to what you anticipated, even from the point of view of a person from an “indirect approach” culture. The Belgian respondent mentioned earlier admits that “From my experience in Japan, I think people consider it a virtue to intuit the help that their friend’s need, and just go ahead and do it without actually consulting them! I have been “helped by a friend” many times where the help wasn’t actually what I wanted. I have learnt not to mention any problems I may be having, even to rather close friends.” There is, of course, variance in style within a single culture. A Japanese respondent expresses the following opinion: “I think Japanese people tend to change their style depending on two things: what we’re asking for, and who we're asking. For example, I can ask a family member or close friend for anything directly, but if the person I need a favor from and I have a less intimate relationship, I carefully consider the timing and how I should communicate even the smallest request.” (OSF, no.1) So perhaps in Japan there is a great diversity of ways of asking for help, which depend on the exact parameters of the social situation. A Canadian respondent notes for example that in his experience “sometimes when colleagues ask me for a favor there is an unspoken expectation that I do what is requested. Although the phrasing of the question may make it sound like there’s a choice, the subtext is that I am expected to do it, regardless of how I might feel about it.” (OSF, no.4) You owe me one! The consensus among our respondents is that social obligations are a strong part of the interpersonal culture in Japan. American respondent Jerry notes on page 66 that “In Japan, people keep track of social debt! This is a reason why people give presents so often, even when they visit someone's home. Any sort of imposition must be compensated for. It's a "give and take" society, as my Japanese wife often says. I guess people are very aware of this, and maybe that’s why they don’t often ask for favors.” Japanese respondent Mariko explains on page 67 that “There is a Japanese expression that goes, "A small kindness can incur a big debt for others" (chisa na shinsetsu, ookina sewa). I don't want to make trouble for another person, so I don't want to just thoughtlessly offer my help, and end up burdening them.” These responses give voice to the Japanese rituals of gift-giving and exchanges of seasonal greetings, which have been described as elaborate ways of balancing social debt and smoothening interpersonal relations. "I'll consider it" = “No way!”, “I am sorry” = “Thank you”. It seems that in Japanese culture, language and behavior pertaining to favors and obligations is quite specialized. Former JICA volunteer Yoshi notes on page 67 that “In Japanese, there are euphemistic phrases used to politely turn down an offer of help, which might not be perceived as refusals by people outside of Japanese culture. For example, "I'll consider it," "That sounds OK," or "That might be a good idea." I feel that this kind of language sometimes leads to misunderstandings when translated directly into English.” Additionally, Mexican respondent Juan admits that Japanese cultural traits have seeped into his own behavior. Rather than simply thanking others, “after spending an extended period of time in Japan I have come to apologize a lot when asking for favors or help, even when I speak my native language. It’s almost like a default setting of humility and politeness.” Finally, even the action of giving gifts can carry quite precise meanings, which are sometimes lost across cultural borders. “Living in Japan, I have had some unpleasant experiences with people who give gifts as an indirect way of asking for future favors. It feels quite uncomfortable to me.”, notes a French respondent in the One Step Further section (no.3) References and further reading • Platt, P. (1994), French or Foe? London: Culture Crossings • Carroll, R. (1988), Cultural Misunderstandings : the French-American experience , Chicago : University of Chicago Press

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UNIT 10 | CULTURAL COMMENTARY